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What Keeps Me from Growing (4 of 10) - Gossip

Gossip is so woven into our lives that sometimes we barely recognize it as it damages and destroys everything in its path. So, how do we stop it? Today we look at the definition, the cause and the cure for gossip.

 

How to Recognize Gossip

1. Be concerned when you hear “secret information” being circulated or if you hear anyone else’s name being used in a conversation connected with that information. Gossip exists whenever persons “talk about others” in less than a favourable way.
2. Gossip often masquerades as “concern” for others.
   You know how it goes. “I hate to say anything about this to you, but I’m ‘concerned’ about so and so.”
3. Sometimes a gossiper will seek you out as their “confidante,” someone to unload on about their “heavy heart” for another person.
   They say to you. “I’m very troubled about so and so and I don’t know who else to talk to about it.” In reality, gossips are only interested in talking about people’s problems, not solving them. Proverbs 16:28 says, “A perverse man stirs up dissension, and a gossip separates close friends.”
4. A gossip thrives on the negative, the secretive and the sensational.
   Any person who is genuinely concerned about solving a problem will do the biblical thing. They will go to the person privately and confront them with their concern. Or they will go privately to their pastor so he can confront the person. If they come to you, it’s likely gossip and not a concern.
5. In church, gossip is often passed along as a prayer request.
   Church prayer meetings usually follow pretty much the same format. The leader asks for prayer requests and then members share them with others. Where the gossip occurs is when someone is having a potentially embarrassing personal hardship and has confided in one of the church members with a prayer request. That church member then airs this person’s “dirty laundry” (or their private pain) to others present under the guise of requesting prayer. Well, prayer is needed, but giving juicy, specific, intimate details that you were told in confidence is not needed. Even if couched in spirituality, it is still gossip.

How Do You Know Whether You Are Gossiping?

When you are telling a story or sharing information about someone else, ask yourself these five questions:

1. How certain am I that the facts are correct?
2. Was the information given in confidence?
3. Have I checked the facts with the person involved?
4. Am I telling this story to help build up others in Christ Jesus?
5. Could I share this information with the Lord Jesus; would He be happy to hear it?

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen” (Ephesians 4:29).

Seven Things to Remember from the Bible about Gossip

1. Gossip is as sinful as murder and will suffer the same consequences unless there is repentance (Romans 1:32).
2. God holds you accountable for your words (Matthew 12:36-37).
3. The person who gossips to you about others, also gossips to others about you.
4. Gossip & slander disqualify you for spiritual leadership (1 Timothy 3:11; James. 3:2).
5. Gossip often thrives upon secrecy. Where secrecy is removed, gossip is hampered.
6. Gossip always contributes to a problem but never to a solution.
7. Gossip always distorts and exaggerates and is never a reliable source of truth.

Gossip Poem (Author unknown)

My name is Gossip.
I am a direct descendant of the father of lies.
I have no respect for justice.
I maim without killing.
I break hearts and ruin lives.
I am cunning and malicious and I gather strength with age.
The more I am quoted, the more I am believed.
My victims are helpless. They cannot protect themselves against me because I have no name and no face.

To track me down is impossible. The harder you try, the more elusive I become.
I am nobody’s friend.
Once I tarnish a reputation, it is never the same.
I topple governments and wreck marriages.
I ruin careers and cause sleepless nights, heartaches, and indigestion.
I make innocent people cry in their pillows.
I make headlines and headaches.
Even my name hisses. I am called Gossip.

 

A BAKER’S DOZEN OF VERSES ABOUT GOSSIP

1. Proverbs 11:13 “Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets, but he who is trustworthy in spirit keeps a thing covered.”
2. Proverbs 16:28 “A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends.”
3. Proverbs 20:19 “Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets; therefore do not associate with a simple babbler.”
4. Proverbs 6:16-19 “There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers.”
5. Proverbs 26:20 “For lack of wood the fire goes out, and where there is no whisperer, quarrelling ceases.”
6. 1 Timothy 5:13 “Besides that, they learn to be idlers, going about from house to house, and not only idlers but also gossips and busybodies, saying what they should not.”
7. Leviticus 19:16 “You shall not go around as a slanderer among your people, and you shall not stand up against the life of your neighbor: I am the Lord.”
8. Romans 1:29 “They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness, evil, covetousness, malice. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, maliciousness. They are gossips.”
9. Proverbs 10:18 “The one who conceals hatred has lying lips, and whoever utters slander is a fool.”
10. Exodus 20:16 “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.”
11. Proverbs 26:22 “The words of a whisperer are like delicious morsels; they go down into the inner parts of the body.”
12. 2 Corinthians 12:20 “For I fear that perhaps when I come I may find you not as I wish, and that you may find me not as you wish—that perhaps there may be quarreling, jealousy, anger, hostility, slander, gossip, conceit, and disorder.”
13. 1 Timothy 5:12-14 “And so incur condemnation for having abandoned their former faith. Besides that, they learn to be idlers, going about from house to house, and not only idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying what they should not. So I would have younger widows marry, bear children, manage their households, and give the adversary no occasion for slander.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

What Keeps Me from Growing (3 of 10) - Laziness

Laziness. It destroys us in life and robs us in death. It's another one of those temptations that keep us from growing spiritually. 

 

Lessons from the lazy person as the writer of Proverbs saw him or her.

1. Unflappable Example - Proverbs 6:6–11 “Go to the ant, O sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise. Without having any chief, officer, or ruler, she prepares her bread in summer and gathers her food in harvest. How long will you lie there, O sluggard? When will you arise from your sleep? A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest, and poverty will come upon you like a robber, and want like an armed man.”
2. Unseasonable Timing - Proverbs 10:4–5 “A slack hand causes poverty, but the hand of the diligent makes rich. He who gathers in summer is a prudent son, but he who sleeps in harvest is a son who brings shame.”
3. Unpleasant Irritant - Proverbs 10:26 “Like vinegar to the teeth and smoke to the eyes, so is the sluggard to those who send him.”
4. Undesirable Position - Proverbs 12:24 “The hand of the diligent will rule, while the slothful will be put to forced labour.”
5. Unbreakable Principle - Proverbs 12:27 “Whoever is slothful will not roast his game, but the diligent man will get precious wealth.”
6. Unfulfilled Longings - Proverbs 13:4 “The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing, while the soul of the diligent is richly supplied.”
7. Unpleasant Path - Proverbs 15:19 “The way of a sluggard is like a hedge of thorns, but the path of the upright is a level highway.”
8. Unreasonable Sleep - Proverbs 19:15 “Slothfulness casts into a deep sleep, and an idle person will suffer hunger.”
9. Undiscovered Motivation - Proverbs 19:24–25 “The sluggard buries his hand in the dish and will not even bring it back to his mouth. Strike a scoffer, and the simple will learn prudence; reprove a man of understanding, and he will gain knowledge.”
10. Unwise Planning - Proverbs 20:4 “The sluggard does not plow in the autumn; he will seek at harvest and have nothing.”
11. Unfulfilled Desires - Proverbs 21:25–26 “The desire of the sluggard kills him, for his hands refuse to labour. All-day long he craves and craves, but the righteous gives and does not hold back.”
12. Unreasonable Excuses - Proverbs 22:13 “The sluggard says, ‘There is a lion outside! I shall be killed in the streets!’”
13. Unkept Life - Proverbs 24:30–34 “I passed by the field of a sluggard, by the vineyard of a man lacking sense, and behold, it was all overgrown with thorns; the ground was covered with nettles, and its stone wall was broken down. Then I saw and considered it; I looked and received instruction. A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest, and poverty will come upon you like a robber, and want like an armed man.”

 

A BAKER’S DOZEN OF VERSES ABOUT LAZINESS

1. Proverbs 6:6 – 11 “Go to the ant, O sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise. Without having any chief, officer, or ruler, she prepares her bread in summer and gathers her food in harvest. How long will you lie there, O sluggard? When will you arise from your sleep? A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest, and poverty will come upon you like a robber, and want like an armed man.”
2. Proverbs 10:4 – 5 “A slack hand causes poverty, but the hand of the diligent makes rich. He who gathers in summer is a prudent son, but he who sleeps in harvest is a son who brings shame.”
3. Proverbs 10:26 “Like vinegar to the teeth and smoke to the eyes, so is the sluggard to those who send him.”
   Proverbs 12:24 “The hand of the diligent will rule, while the slothful will be put to forced labour.”
4. Proverbs 12:27 “Whoever is slothful will not roast his game, but the diligent man will get precious wealth.”
5. Proverbs 13:4 “The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing, while the soul of the diligent is richly supplied.”
6. Proverbs 15:19 “The way of a sluggard is like a hedge of thorns, but the path of the upright is a level highway.”
7. Proverbs 19:15 “Slothfulness casts into a deep sleep, and an idle person will suffer hunger.”
8. Proverbs 19:24 – 25 “The sluggard buries his hand in the dish and will not even bring it back to his mouth. Strike a scoffer, and the simple will learn prudence; reprove a man of understanding, and he will gain knowledge.”
9. Proverbs 20:4 “The sluggard does not plow in the autumn; he will seek at harvest and have nothing.”
10. Proverbs 21:25 – 26 “The desire of the sluggard kills him, for his hands refuse to labour. All-day long he craves and craves, but the righteous gives and does not hold back.”
11. Proverbs 22:13 “The sluggard says, ‘There is a lion outside! I shall be killed in the streets!’” (Unreasonable fear.)
12. Proverbs 24:30 – 34 “I passed by the field of a sluggard, by the vineyard of a man lacking sense, and behold, it was all overgrown with thorns; the ground was covered with nettles, and its stone wall was broken down. Then I saw and considered it; I looked and received instruction. A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest, and poverty will come upon you like a robber, and want like an armed man.” (Unkempt life.)
13. Proverbs 26:13 – 16 “The sluggard says, ‘There is a lion in the road! There is a lion in the streets!’ As a door turns on its hinges, so does a sluggard on his bed. The sluggard buries his hand in the dish; it wears him out to bring it back to his mouth. The sluggard is wiser in his own eyes than seven men who can answer sensibly.” (Unbelievable self-assurance.)
14. Proverbs 28:19 “Whoever works his land will have plenty of bread, but he who follows worthless pursuits will have plenty of poverty.” (Unproductive use of time.)

 

 

 

What Keeps Me from Growing (2 of 10) - Anger

What Keeps Me from Growing?

Yesterday we talked about worry, today our topic is Anger...

 

How can we tell when we are righteously indignant about some injustice versus when we are just plain angry, sinfully angry? Here are five keys. See if any of them is true in your life.

1. Anger becomes sinful when whatever drives us to get angry is a selfish
   motivation. James 1:20
2. Anger becomes sinful when we allow our anger to detract from our giving glory to God. 1 Corinthians 10:31
3. Anger becomes sinful when we don’t deal with it properly and allow it to linger in our lives. Ephesians 4:26-27. Anger turns to sin when it is allowed to boil over without any restraint, often causing irreparable consequences.
4. Anger becomes sinful when it is the lead-off emotion, or should I say reaction, to everything that threatens our pride.
5. Anger also becomes sin when you will not permit your anger to be pacified, or when you keep it all inside.
   
   

There is a classic passage in the Bible that I find very helpful when dealing with my anger. It is Ephesians 4, verses 25 to the end of the chapter. Here are five things the apostle Paul is telling us in this passage about anger.

1. If you are angry about something, you cannot deal with it by keeping your anger bottled up.
2. Don’t let your anger build up; deal with it as soon as possible.
3. Attack the problem within you, not the person who angered you.
4. Don’t do what comes naturally; do what is supernatural.
5. Finally, we must act to solve the problem through forgiveness, not angry
   retaliation.

A BAKER’S DOZEN OF VERSES ABOUT ANGER

1. Psalm 37:8 “Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath! Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil.”
2. Proverbs 14:29 “Whoever is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly.”
3. Ephesians 4:31 “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.”
4. Proverbs 19:11 “Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.”
5. James 1:19-20 “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.”
6. Ecclesiastes 7:9 “Be not quick in your spirit to become angry, for anger lodges in the bosom of fools.”
7. Proverbs 16:32 “Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.”
8. Proverbs 29:11 “A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back.”
9. Ephesians 4:26 - 27 “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil.”
10. Proverbs 15:18 “A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.”
11. Colossians 3:8 “But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth.”
12. Proverbs 22:24 “Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a
    wrathful man.”
13. Galatians 5:19 - 21 “Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.”

What Keeps Me from Growing (1 of 10) - Worry

We're so glad to have you with us today as we begin a new two-week series called What keeps me from growing? And today we start by looking at Worry.

 

Seven practical reasons why you should not worry.  

1. When you worry, you accomplish nothing at all. Worry is of no value whatsoever.
2. Not only will worrying not help you at all, but worrying is also harmful to you. 
3. Worry is often about things in the past that we have no way to deal with.
4. Worry is often about things that will never actually happen.
5. Worry is the antithesis of faith. If trusting God is His desire for us, worrying is clearly showing little respect for God.
6. Worry opens the door for Christians to fall into deeper sin.
7. Worry has a way of consuming us.

Here’s a promise to take with you today. Psalm 34:4, “I sought the Lord, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears.” Isn’t that a great promise? 

 

A BAKER’S DOZEN OF VERSES ABOUT WORRY 

1. Matthew 6:25-27 “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? 
2. Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all who labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” 
3. Luke 12:25 “And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?” 
4. John 14:27 “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” 
5. 2 Thessalonians 3:16 “Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times in every way. The Lord be with you all.” 
6. Psalm 55:22 “Cast your burden on the LORD, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved.” 
7. Proverbs 12:25 “Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad.” 
8. Philippians 4:6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” 
9. 1 Peter 5:7 “Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.” 
10. Isaiah 43:1-3 “But now thus says the LORD, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: ‘Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the LORD your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.” 
11. Psalm 56:3 “‘When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.’” 
12. Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” 
13. Romans 8:31 “What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?” 

 

JUDGES: Turning defeat into victory (20 of 20) - When punishment is too severe

As we wrap up our study of the Book of Judges, we'll hear some of the saddest stories ever recorded in the Bible.  The final chapters of the book record what people do when they forget about God...

(Judges 20 & 21)

 

JUDGES: Turning defeat into victory (19 of 20) - How deep the moral mess

In today's study in the book of Judges is a sad one... the story is horrible. It's a story that's hard to read and difficult for us to hear... it's about a Levite and his concubine.

(Judges 19)

JUDGES: Turning defeat into victory (18 of 20) - Micah and moral malaise

Today we're in Judges 17 and we'll be looking at a man named Micah, who wasn't a judge... How's that?

JUDGES: Turning defeat into victory (17 of 20) - The Delilah dilemma

Samson never learned how to control his lust, and even when he found the girl for him his lust came back to haunt him and so does that girl. 

(Judges 16)

JUDGES: Turning defeat into victory (16 of 20) - Samson‘s failure as a husband

Today we'll look at one of the most famous men in the Bible, Sampson. Here's a man that had everything going for him but had some missing pieces in his relationship with God.

(Judges 13, 14 & 15) 

 

JUDGES: Turning defeat into victory (15 of 20) - Manoah and a miracle boy

Today we turn to Judges 13 for an interesting story about a man called Manoah and a miracle boy.